“Whenever you are creating beauty around you, you are restoring your own soul.”
~Alice Walker
If you didn’t know, the world is a bit of a dumpster fire right now.
When you add what’s happening on the planet, in our country and communities, to the laundry list of shit going on in our own lives, it’s no wonder sitting in the closet and closing the door seems like a really good idea. Seriously, if I had the room at home, I certainly would. Cleaning out portion of a closet to create a small, cozy, dark space to hide from everything? Yes, please.
But hiding away isn’t going to happen so we’ll have to find other ways of coping with the craziness. Ways of staying in the moment without allowing our minds to run amok and without doom scrolling and imagining the worst.
Every time you sit down to tend to your needs in the company of stitches, you create beauty for yourself and for your environment, even if you don’t put your pieces on display. And in this season of life, creating beauty with your hands is an act of self-preservation and of personal power.
Every day it seems like we are waking up and having to reorient ourselves to a new reality, whether it’s work, family, relationships, community or world affairs. The instability and constant shifts can be disheartening and exhausting.
Stitching is a way to give ourselves some semblance of control over SOMETHING in our lives. It gives us a place to rest from the madness that is constantly swirling around us. So many of us act like we’re “fine” (“I’m fine”) and that’s crap. I cannot tell you the number of times I’ve woken up in the morning, sat on the side of my bed and put my head in my hands, already feeling overwhelmed with concerns and commitments on my plate. It’s an unfortunate way to start the day and yet, it is the reality of so many of us.
If you’re doing this in some way, you may be heading towards burnout or illness. It’s insidious with how it creeps up. The increasing tiredness and fatigue. Feeling close to tears at unexpected times. The irritation that flares up when we feel our boundaries are being compromised, our personal time being hijacked. Headaches, tight bodies, tight chests & shallow breaths. If you haven’t already, start recognizing these symptoms for what they really are: a warning.
See it as an opportunity to STOP MOVING. Stop moving and catch your breath. REST. Sit and connect to your heartbeat. Is it fast? Can you hear it pounding or gently beating? Follow your breath. It is getting stuck? Is it up around your chest or lower, in your belly? Are you breathing quick or slow? Don’t try to fix anything; just notice.
While you’re noticing and resting, you can use this time to start a new journal stitch page or add to one already in progress. I’ve done that. It’s like you have more to “say” on that piece and so you lay down more stitches. There are no rules. Over-stitch to your heart’s content.
Do you have to finish it? Nope. I’ll write more on that in another post.
Every time you sit down and pick up your piece, you are connecting to a long history of women who engaged in the act of stitching, day in and day out, for hundreds and hundreds of years.
Women figured out “how to make meaning during times of struggle”, how to “overcome the challenges they faced in life and what role [making] played in the process” (“With Her Own Hands“, Nicole Nehrig, 2025). Stitching can help you create a grounding or centering practice. A place to land on days when you just want to sit with your head in your hands or cry at unexpected times.
Making marks with a needle and thread is a time-honored way for women to exercise agency and have a place to set her emotions. I won’t go off on a tangent right now, however, women such as Mary, Queen of Scots, have used stitching as a subversive act to weaken misogynistic ideals and proclaim power and authority at the same time. Is this the only example? Oh, hell no. Stitching has been used and is still being used to politically and socially point out the flaws in our society as well as give women a place of solace to feel and BE
Ways you can use stitching to process daily drama :
- stitch the frustration of going to a job you can no longer tolerate.
- stitch the anger at co-workers who gossip and back-stab to get a leg up.
- stitch the exhaustion and fatigue of caring for another, in whatever capacity.
- stitch the fear and sadness of unexpected change and challenges.
- stitch the anxiety and depression that may be holding you frozen and stuck.
- stitch the trauma that keeps living rent free in your body and mind.
- stitch the thoughts that circle around like sharks in bloody water.
The combination of fabric and stitches you create, no matter how simple or complex, is your manifestation of a truly unique piece of textile art. No one in the world can ever recreate anything like it because it comes from YOU.
As you continue making your pieces in quietude, you will most likely find yourself starting to get more creative with the way the stitches want to be laid down.
Maybe they want to change directions or cross over each other…
Maybe they want to follow a shape or outline of something, like a stamp or template…
Maybe they want to do everything…
Trust me, these are not as complicated as they look. They are literally just stitches on fabric. Thread. Needle. In. Out. Rinse. Repeat. No pattern. No instructions. Look at my stitches. They’re not even. Barely straight. And the edges of this piece are wonky and fraying. This is the authentic, organic process of stitching your emotions.
I stitched what I was feeling, letting my whirling emotions and intuition create what was needed at the time. Letting that energy work through until it is done.
Your pieces will be just as unique and beautiful and exactly what you need at the time.
Sit, sip and stitch with me.
in the company of stitches 
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